Going on 3 years.

It is soooo quiet here. I love it. I love walking to the store at 7 or 8pm and NO ONE would be out there. Weird, but I love it :-D

I'm definitely getting cabin fever though. Time to move again.

And I'm sure that my presence is felt around here, but I haven't TOUCHED anyone like I usually do. Hmmm....Perhaps it was just a well-deserved Break after what I've been through and I although I find myself in this room, I'm not here to Heal it. Not this one. Just a nice respite.

Okay, well, not much can be said about the place I'm in now. Nothing I've not already said. Or pictures to show.

Sooo...here's a story about my last place of residence...got a billion of them :-D

There was this lady living across the street from me. She was soooo weird. She is like Pencil Thin. My late father used to call her Olive Oyl :-D. I remember when she got pregnant...whoa, that was a sight :-D

Anyhow, she was always staring into my windows because I didn't have curtains then, (because I didn't think anyone was staring into my windows) LOL. (Good Lord, what she musta seen!  My friend dancing with me on my coffeetable in her bra & panties, LMAO)
I digress again...anyhow...she stared at me wherever I went. Then it happened....

I noticed that she started to do her hair like mine. I noticed that whatever I wore, she'd run up into her apt. and come back wearing something similar. (BTW, she had the most horrendous taste in clothes that were most unflattering for her rail-thin frame). I started to overhear her talking to people...using MY expressions!!!

NO, Imitation is NOT flattery!!! Only I can be ME dammit! :-D (I got a little taste of what it feels like to be a celeb with people emulating them...and it made me want to vomit!!!)

In no particular order...(and yes, the photo is Yours Truly :-D)

~No way, Siona! The Moon followed MEEEEE! :-P

~That I was adopted.

~That I controlled the weather...the rain, the sun, the snowflakes :-D

~That if I just kept checking the back of the closets, Narnia would open up for me :-D

~My favorite imaginary super-power was to shrink things...though I now think this was to feed some sort of closet-kleptomania :-D

~That I was not adopted, but Kidnapped.

~That everyone was living in Peace and Harmony because much of early childhood was a very thought out and intended Illusion. (all the real stuff came out when I got sent out the room)

~That everyone could read my mind. (yeah, a little bit of Glass-Head Syndrome, LOL)

~That I was not adopted or kidnapped...I was from another Galaxy. :-D

To sum up, I'll quote my eldest son after hearing about HIS childhood beliefs...
"Gawwwwwwwd....I was so stupid then." LOL. :-D

"When you are having a hard time letting go of something, what do you do? What suggestions would you have for someone who is trying to release or let go of something that's no longer serving them?"


Relax your sphincter....and let it goooooo.

LMAO...it's the same thing :-D Just like your body has its processes and eliminates waste and what it doesn't need, we have to do the same thing in other parts of our lives.

Think about how uncomfortable being constipated is. You feel heavy and bloated.
When you finally let that shit go...ahhhhh...so much lighter and happier and unencumbered. That is toxic stuff! Let it go! What're you keeping it for? LOL :-D

Relax...Release...(Reuse and Recycle where possible)
This is one of Life's Little Pleasures =)

They're not really my particular "favorites"...just stories that ARE told...ALOT.

~Number One on the list is the "Ariela died when she was a baby" story. Always told in a way that made me feel like they didn't WANT me to be Resurrected. Oh well, take that up with my Creator when you get there. :-D

~The one about my sister was outside "eating raisins" off the ground...which was really little turds.

~The one when I was about 6 and stepped on a tack and started screaming, "A Tack! A Tack! A Tack!" and my brother came rushing in saying, "Attack Who? Attack Who?" LMAO.

~I recently heard a story from a friend who lived down the block from my family, about when my Father had Alzheimers and would still go off walking around by himself. My friend told me that my dad got lost a half-block away from the house but was still soooo polite and asked this friend, "Excuse me, I seem to have gotten turned around. Do you know where I live?" :-D Thank God everyone knew him and he asked the right person, who escorted him home. =)

That IS one of my faves, because it's heartwarming...And of course, I miss my Dad. =)

LOL...that's what I call them....don't like the words 'retarded' or 'mentally challenged' so I affectionately call them Rainmen. :-D

Sooo...Friday, was walking home from picking up my son from school and saw a gentleman standing at the corner I was approaching looking very flustered. People stood around staring at him, goodness knows how long he was standing there while people gawked.

About half block nearer to him, he locked eyes with me and smiled. When I got close, I could see he was holding a bag from the local library...and I smiled at his autonomy. He said, "Are you going over there? Are you going over THERE?" pointing across the street, and latched onto my forearm with an iron grip. He started telling me his whole schedule as I crossed him to the other side of the street, "I go to the library on Mondays not Fridays. It's Friday, I should go on Mondays. I always go on Mondays, not Fridays. It's Friday" :-D (cute, lol)

Got to the other side of the street and he turned me to face the OTHER street now, "Are you going over THERE too? Are you going over THERE too? I have to go over THERE (as we're midway across the 2nd street) I have to go home. I have to go home. I have to go home. I have to go home. I have to go home. (:-D)" I asked him, "Do you know how to get home?" By this time we were across the street and he said, "Leave me alone! Leave me alone! Leave me alone!" OMG :-D LMAO. Now all these people who couldn't be bothered with him are all staring at me. :-D LOL The man was panicked for a minute, but I guess he saw his landmarks and continued on his way "Home" :-D

People staring at me like, "Why did you even bother?" Me staring back at them like, "WTF is wrong with you people? Why don't YOU even bother and care???"

So, happy to have played Guardian Angel to this Dear One...I hope he got home safely.

Years ago, I was befriended by a high school teenager whose route home was past my house. (I have a good relationship with our young people, they like to show me their accomplishments and report cards, even ones I don't really "know", but who have seen me around...and of course I encourage this!)

Anywho, I can't remember what we talked about, he'd spend a few minutes each day sitting on my front porch chatting. I thought he was BRILLIANT. He was always excited to show me his Artwork and Poetry and sang me a few songs he'd written too. He was an all-around cutie pie, the spitting image of Leonardo DiCaprio.



Like I said, Just Brilliant.
He shined...and in a way that really pulled on my HeartStrings...he was Sooooo Innocent....Soooo Pure....Soooo Sweet....Sooooo Open and Wonder-Filled.
(yeah, like Me, LOL)


He shared his struggles with me...he wasn't understood by his family and peers. He told me I was the only person he could talk to. After some time, he presented me with his school ring, insisting he wanted me to have it (Trust Me, I wanted HIM to keep something so special and momentous)...but he wouldn't have it. He cried. I had to accept it and planned to keep it for a few days and convince him to take it back and wear it. He'd call me now and then just to chat a few minutes. Never long.

One night, shortly after receiving his ring, my phone rang. It was a woman who said she was the young man's stepmother and demanded that I return his ring to HER, she would come pick it up and how she spent so much money on getting it for him using his stipend the government was paying her to care for him....And did I have any idea that he attended a Special School...and did I have any idea that he was RETARDED?

Whaaaaa...???

Well, holy shit, Batman...if he's retarded, I'm dumber than that and so is everyone else, because I can't draw or sing or write poetry like he did!!!

I was stunned. There was nothing "retarded" about him...

Are these talented and brilliant young ones being classified as "retarded"????!!!!
Someone that was to me like a breath of fresh air? Like sunshine on Earth? If Jesus had incarnated again into human form and walked amongst us quietly, He would be Him.
I told the stepmother my perspective of her stepson. How multi-talented he is. How proud I am of him.Told her gently not to judge him. He's different, but in no way retarded.

She judged him unfairly, I'm sure many in his circle did. I witnessed one last time his Innocence challenged on the streets as he walked by. Some kids taunting him Just For Looking Like A Ray Of Sunshine and being sooo sweetly polite.
One kid knocked this precious young man out cold.

Sigh. Long and difficult story. In the end, this Sweet Angel hung himself...the next night after his stepmother came by to pick up his ring. (she called me back to blame me for his death...if I would've just "minded my own business and not talked to him or encouraged him...why did I so stupidly convince him he could BE something and give him hope...why did I even LOOK at 'this retard'"?)

Sigh. Again. Tears. Sigh. HeartPain. More tears and sighs.

I wrote this blog, shared this experience...because there are alot of Indigo Children, Crystal, Starseed and Rainbow Children who deal with this harsh, cruel judgment.
Sometimes not being understood...being different...is Fatal.

And unnecessary. If people would just Understand From The Inside (walk in another's shoes)...from being sympathetic to anothers Journey ...by being compassionate and Loving with all of Divine Creation. ESPECIALLY with those who you see as 'different'.
The "challenged" have Much to Teach us. In all actuality, We are the ones with the challenge to... Judge Not.
May we only support and embrace them from henceforth.

Thank You for listening~~~<3

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in my name

It means people want to recognize your Good Works now that you're dead.


So Stupid that people only know what they had when it's gone.
I want Living people to be inducted into sainthood. 

HEAVEN #2865 To the Heart Belongs the Kingdom, September 28, 2008

God said:

Your compassion is greater now. Your compassion for every living thing is greater. As your joy increases, you have a greater grasp of others' perceptions and what they go through. You have gone through what they grow through now.

Now you have given up the sadful vision. You have thankfully traded it in for happiness, and now your heart flutters, and now you see through the pain of others, and your heart comes closer to theirs. Now compassion becomes blessing.

You always wanted other people to think like you and be like you, but this is different. In this compassion, your heart beats a salute to those you feel compassionate for. Now it is for you to see the seeming others in tandem with the joy you live. The joy you live, you can only give it away. You can only send it everywhere.

Do not think of the opening of your heart as wounding. Opening your heart is tender, but it is not wounding. A heart that contributes to the healing of other hearts cannot be wounded. Tender, yes. Wounded, no. A sensitive heart such as yours beats in My heart. You are to be a salve to all other hearts in the world. You are to tender the hearts of all living things.

You do not bow down to other hearts. You lift them up. They do not have to note your compassion. It's just that you have to have it. You bless as you move along. You bless all hearts because they are yours and because there is nothing else to do. You cannot do any less.

Now, let Us together bless all the hearts that are like wounded birds, and help them to get their wings and fly away from any suffering and to reach Heaven where We sit now.

Not one sparrow is to be hurt. All living Beings, big or small, are to engender joy. All are learning that perceived suffering is not needed. It serves no purpose but to increase hurt.

All are done with the hurting mode now. Now a blessing mode is acquired. It is not really acquired. It just is being used. Joy has come to the forefront. As hurt recedes, joy jumps in. Toss in the joy, beloveds. Pick up your joy of heart and pass it from heart to heart the way a basketball is passed across the court.

Your heart was never for yourself alone. It was always to expand itself and so expand the world. Your heart is meant to be the Heart of Hearts. Your heart was meant to reach everywhere. Your heart has always reached everywhere. And now you send a higher note. Now your heart is the bird singing across the Universe. Now you are blessing the world with your heart. Now your heart rules the world. Now your heart is the metronome of the entire Universe. You are the one who sets the tone for others to follow.

Your heart was always more than you credited it with. Your heart was always reflecting the song in Mine. Now you know, and your knowing makes all the difference in the world. It makes all the difference to the world.

Whose world did you think this was anyway? Did you think it was someone else's? Did you think that this very world you live in wasn't yours? Did you think it didn't belong to you, or you to it? What were you thinking, beloved? What were you thinking?

But, no matter, it is not a matter of thinking. It is a matter of heart. To the heart belongs the Kingdom. To your heart belongs the Kingdom. In your heart, I rest.

Permanent Link: http://www.heavenletters.org/to-the-heart-belongs-the-kingdom.html

I keep mentioning that I have a rampant squirrel terrorist in my neighborhood who has a particular dislike of ME.

It has doo-dooed on my window sills and patio chairs. It pulls up and destroys all my plants and flowers. It sits on my air conditioner and tells me off in squirrel language. It throws the nuts off the trees at people and chatters at them. It eats the tenderest parts of my flowers and leaves a massacre of petals. The buds that are just about to open, he will eat off the tips. Just a terrorist.

I caught a whole drama going down right outside my bedroom! Check it out...

This is when I noticed the Blue Jay. (It IS a Blue Jay, isn't it?)...and Duh, finally remembered I had a camera. :-D Ran to get it and a drama unfolded...This is taken through the window and it's hazy. Then I eased the door open to get the next shot...



Ahhh...that's better. Soooo pretty! And BIG! Didn't know they were that big!



AHAAAA! There's the little terrorist now!!! A second after this, he noticed the Blue Jay and snuck around the fencing...(I know, gasp! He's on the hunt!)



Oh Thank God that Beautiful Blue Jay has good reflexes! I would've hated to witness a capture! YAY BlueJay!



Ahhhh...safe for the moment! And if you look closely, there's a dead squirrel in the back of the shot, where the Blue Jay jumped onto it and pranced around in Victory! LOL :-D
Yeah, you go, Blue Jay! Show that little terrorist what happens to bad squirrels! :-D



Hope you enjoyed...now if only I could catch a photo of the green parrots that hang out here, and also the Monarch Butterfly migration over my house. =)